We are creatures of connection by nature. In fact, research by neuroscientist Dr. Candace Pert suggests that our ability to form the right connections could actually lengthen our life span. Our ability to grow and evolve is directly proportionate to the quality of our connections to our inner world, our outer environment, and to other people. In other words, our connections speed up our personal evolutionary process. And whether you know it or not, on a very basic level, there’s a part of you that’s confident in the ability to form the right relationships, at the right time—those necessary for your next stage of evolution.
The Sufis tell the story of a man who in his youth wanted to change the world. He was passionate, and he prayed every day to be successful. But he made no progress. As the years went by and he approached middle age, he changed his prayer.
Most of us have found ourselves wanting to help someone else through prayer. This is understandable, for it is natural, since love and caring are built into our hearts, to want to help those who appear to be going through a difficult time in their lives. But how do we do this? …
Why do you need forgiveness to reach your Dream? When you're not forgiving, you're angry and tight. You're holding onto old hurts and hugging your rightness around you like a parka against the stinging winds of change. Your arms are crossed and your mind is crossing out possibilities.
If you think about it, what we can't forgive is really who we can't forgive: nonrelatives, our parents, our partners, and ourselves. We're going to look at each of these in turn-and do something about them.
Why? Because they're impeding your progress toward your Dream.
One of the great barriers to an experience of God's presence is lack of forgiveness. We justify our anger, and it becomes resentment, and if it is fed long enough by hurtful memories, thoughts of revenge and behavior, it grows into hatred, and a hate-filled soul cannot feel God's love. We may strike out at the other person, but our hands are around our own throat, restricting our ability to breathe peace and harmony into our world. We limit ourselves with our lack of forgiveness of others, but it is also possible to be unwilling to forgive ourselves ...
“The widest possibilities for spiritual growth lie in the give-and-take of everyday relationships.”—Eknath Easwaran
Most of the calls I receive for spiritual coaching involve relationships. People are either experiencing a loss of connection with their goals, dreams, and visions, or they are confused about their purpose and where to go from here.