Healing a Relationship Even After Death

Affirmative prayer has the power to change our perception of current experiences. It grounds us in the present, such that we open ourselves to new possibilities for the future.

But how might affirmative prayer bring lasting peace to relationships from our past? How might the power to transform our thinking through prayer become the catalyst for growth from past pain?

My biological father passed away in 2008. He had left our family when I was a child, and we did not speak again for 30 years. The few times we spoke, after I reached out, brought a bit of peace to that experience. It was not until he passed that I recognized how much remained unaddressed.

For years, I clung to stories that somehow I was the reason he left. I believed his departure meant I was flawed and unworthy of love. I feared trusting others. I was mistakenly sure that they, too, would see my brokenness and disappear.

In all cases, I AM okay taps into the source of peace and strength that lies within. I AM okay affirms that God is at work. I AM okay reminds me that I am loved, nurtured, and supported by the One Power and One Presence in the Universe.

These beliefs ran counter to Truth, but I felt powerless to change. Attempts to resolve them felt like letting go of a familiar part of myself.

Given that my father had died, I would never be able to ask the questions I felt needed answers in order to heal. The best resolution I could muster was to move on despite the painful memories and meanings I had given the past.

Moving Forward in Wholeness

I did move on—but every relationship, career opportunity, and decision was tainted with the idea that I was undeserving.

My healing journey began with a simple question: Am I willing to affirm my innate wholeness and perfection and begin the process of releasing any beliefs that run counter to this Truth?

I sat with it. I held it in prayer and meditation. It flooded the pages of my journal. The question of my willingness remained front and center until I finally said, “Yes, I AM willing.”

The moment we affirm willingness, the flood of infinite healing that is always available rushes to our aid. Yes, I AM willing became the opening statement of my daily prayer life. Today this phrase represents the firstfruits of a prayer practice that empowers my spiritual evolution.

The affirmation I AM willing to see myself as whole over time became I AM whole. Affirming innate wholeness, I become an active participant in releasing thoughts of brokenness.

I am willing to be complete likewise became I AM complete. In the broader context of life, affirming completion establishes my innate worth as a perfect expression of God. In the context of a situation, affirming completion means I no longer choose to partake of the emotional juice it affords. I move on, free of the emotional burden and open to a deeper realization of Truth.

You Are Okay

In my daily practice, one affirmative prayer truly acts as my go-to in moments I feel deeply disturbed: I AM okay. In this context, okay is an expression of acceptance. When confronted with challenges of any type, acceptance allows me to see what is so. It reminds me that regardless of conditions, I contain the necessary spiritual tools to meet that challenge. Sometimes they are at my fingertips. Other times I need to pause and draw from the infinite wellspring within.

In all cases, I AM okay taps into the source of peace and strength that lies within. I AM okay affirms that God is at work. I AM okay reminds me that I am loved, nurtured, and supported by the one power and one presence in the Universe.

Affirmative prayer has offered me the opportunity to heal the relationship with my father. While most of this healing occurred long after the opportunity to reconcile on this earthly plane, in Spirit I know it is complete. Releasing both the past events surrounding our relationship and all the meaning I gave to them is an ongoing journey—one for which I am innately prepared.

Affirmative prayer continues to transform my life as I remain willing, and I am certain it will do the same for you. As you begin to explore your own willingness, always remember: You are whole. You are complete. And most important, you are okay.

Excerpted from The Power of Prayer booklet.

About the Author

Rev. David B. Adams is senior cominister at Unity of Independence, Missouri.


No Results