The Spiritual Heart of the 12 Steps

When we get into recovery, our first priority is physical health and well-being. Then as we work our recovery program, the fog in our brain lifts and we can make basic choices, like finding a job, paying the bills, and being a productive member of society.

We slowly develop the capacity to feel and express emotions beyond the primal mad, sad, glad, or bad. And we discover we don’t need to use something to fix our feelings because they are so uncomfortable.

Finally, our spiritual nature begins to expand, and it becomes an integral part of recovery.

Whether we realize it or not, we engage with spiritual principles from day one. I remember when I first got into recovery, I heard someone say that addiction was a spiritual disease and required a spiritual answer. In starting down the road of the 12 steps, we say yes to a life founded on universal spiritual principles.

Below is my own understanding of the spiritual principles behind the 12 steps. It saved my life three decades ago and still lies at the heart of my journey.

Step One

Step One is about simple HONESTY. We admit we are powerless and our lives are unmanageable. This is no-holds barred truth-telling, and probably something we haven’t done in a very long time. When we tell the truth about our life it brings a sense of relief, and we discover we’re not alone.

Step Two

Step Two opens the door to HOPE. It tells me life can be different, that I don’t have to continue on this suicidal death march. Hope recognizes I can be delivered from the insanity of addiction, but most important, hope says something greater is possible for me.

Step Three

Step Three focuses on FAITH. I begin to intentionally connect to something greater than me, a higher power of my own understanding. For some it’s God, for others it’s nature. The point is that we start practicing some form of trust and confidence in something beyond ourselves. It is an invitation to step away from our self-centeredness and into a world of benevolence and generosity.

Step Four

Step Four is taking a giant leap of COURAGE. In writing a “searching and fearless moral inventory,” we are doing something that is all about us and can be quite difficult and fearful. Yet with a strong heart and mind, we put our world on paper. With courage we take responsibility for our lives and begin righting the wrongs.

Step Five

Step Five is about TRUST, relying on the character and strength of another person to support us as we share our deepest, shame-filled secrets. The trust we place in another brings renewed life as we experience someone loving us just as we are.

Step Six

Step Six is expanding our practice of WILLINGNESS. This principle doesn’t say I have to do something right this minute or be perfect at anything. Instead, being “entirely ready” is the willingness to choose to say yes to showing up differently, to releasing my old patterns of thoughts, feelings, and actions.

Step Seven

Step Seven is about HUMILITY. Many of us come to recovery well-versed in humiliation and get confused about this spiritual principle. Humility is simply an honest evaluation of self. The practice of humility is seeing and embracing the wonderful things about ourselves so we can also acknowledge our shortcomings without shame and truly let go. In doing so, we claim our inherent goodness.

Step Eight

Step Eight introduces us to a new level of INTEGRITY. Nobody comes to recovery overflowing with kindness or respect for ourselves or others. Integrity is doing the right thing for the right reason, especially when no one is watching. This step propels us into this practice. We consciously choose to turn our focus to the others in our lives, setting the stage for asking for forgiveness.

Step Nine

Step Nine is LOVE. Making amends is not about saying “I’m sorry.” Instead it is approaching another person we have harmed to admit our wrongs, while also committing to changing our behaviors. No excuses, no explanations, simply being present to the person, allowing them to have their experience and voice. This step is all about the other person. This is compassion, this is love.

Step 10

Step 10 is often referred to as the first of the three maintenance steps. For me this step is about PERSEVERANCE—remaining steadfast to a principle regardless of the obstacles. This spiritual principle is a daily walk I take requiring self-reflection, self-discipline, and self-compassion. Some days it can be exhausting, but recovery is a daily commitment to living a life of healing and wholeness.

Step 11

Step 11 is the first step that really takes a deep dive into SPIRITUALITY. While we have been introduced in the early steps to the idea of God or a higher power, this is about consciously choosing the practices of prayer and meditation for our spiritual growth. Spirituality is the sacred framework we use to create meaning in our lives. Prayer and meditation, in whatever form these take, are the practices we use to enhance and grow our relationship with a higher power and with our world around us.

Step 12

Finally, Step 12 calls us to be in SERVICE. If it weren’t for the spiritual practice of service, no one would even know about recovery. We often hear the phrase, “We keep what we have by giving it away,” which is another way of demonstrating how grateful we are for our lives and for the gifts and graces that continue to unfold.

These principles are woven into the steps and together comprise a road map for living life abundantly and joyfully. Each principle is a seed for a life of service focused on healing and compassionate service, the miracle of freedom that only comes by saying yes.

This article first appeared in the Unity booklet The Spiritual Journey from Addiction to Recovery. All the authors chose to remain anonymous in keeping with the tradition of 12-step groups.